It's the Animals, Didiot!

Dogue de Bordeaux Loves Recession

I spotted this beautiful dog, called the Dogue de Bordeaux, in the town of Bordeaux in the country of France. He was extremely worried about the economic recession and even more worried because the worrying was giving him wrinkles. I told him he should be happy because alcohol sales actually rise during recession. His town of Bordeaux is busy making and selling wine for the world. He now realizes that there is no fear of his human running out of dog food.

The Dogue de Bordeaux breed is a strong dog with a sweet temper toward humans and other dogs. Humans once used them to pull carts and haul objects. These dogues also guarded flocks and protected European castles.

Rhinos are Angry at Humans

Earthlings, your rhinos are endangered and they are mad about it. The reason they are killed is the craziest reason we have seen in the vast universe. Talk about Didiot-like behavior.

First, a few rhino facts.

Rhinos are not all alike. You have five species of rhinos on Earth. In Africa you have the black and white rhinos. In India you have the Indian, Javan and Sumatran Rhinos. The Indian and Javan have one horn, the others have two.

These spectacular creatures are the second largest land mammal on your planet (the elephant is larger). These sweet guys are herbivores so they only eat plants. These creatures live alone. They only use their horns to defend themselves against lions, tiger and hyenas.

Cats Just Want to Eat Birds

Earthlings, I met this cool cat named Diego. We were having a nice discussion about human politics when he suddenly leaped from his seat and 8 feet across the room to the window.  He got a crazed look in his eyes and began making weird half meows with his furry lips.

I looked to see what was troubling him. He told me he wanted to eat those birds. Apparently he has a deep inborn instinct to eat birds, despite the fact that he is fed tasty, specially-prepared gourmet feline food twice per day by his human.

Send me your cute pet or animal photos, humans! dink@itstheanimalsdidiot.com

A Kitty and Parrot Friendship

I found this cat-loving bird and was amazed. It shows you that some Earthlings animals are evolving and starting to get along. Now if all humans would just evolve and stop being Didiots.

Share your favorite animal photos or videos. dink@itstheanimalsdidiot.com

Jaguar Cats v. Cars

Earthlings, I am so confused. There are two types of beautiful Jaguars on your planet.

I have seen Jaguar cats in Arizona, New Mexico and Texas and from Mexico to Patagonia. This beautiful Earthling is endangered due to human population growth and agricultural expansion. These cats are hunted and poached by livestock ranchers, and are endangered throughout their entire range.

The Jaguar cat is known for catching his prey in one swift pounce. Unlike other Earthling felines, he loves to swim and play in the water. He will even catch fish.

Both the cat and the car purr like a kitten. Both are fast and sleek. One Jaguar devours deer, crocodiles, snakes, monkeys, deer, sloths, tapirs, turtles, eggs, frogs and fish. The other devours gasoline and attracts beautiful women. One Jaguar prefers the cities, while the other prefers forests, rainforests, swamps, grasslands and mountains.

Which Jaguar do you prefer?

• Help Jaguars and other wildlife by adopting a jaguar today at our Wildlife Adoption Center.
• Take Action for Wildlife at our Wildlife Action Center.